Fur Babies

by | 20 Jul 2014

To fur, or not to fur: that is the question.

In the absence of a baby, I’ve been wondering whether it might be time to get a pet. On balance, I think I’m a cat person. But I love dogs too. In fact, anything with a tail is good with me (well, apart from rats).

It’s kind of ironic that the main reason we haven’t got one before is because of the commitment. Quite how we’re going to manage a baby if we can’t cope with a cat does worry me. I blame it on the limbo of long-term-trying-to-conceive. I can’t settle, constantly waiting for the future to arrive so we can make proper plans.

A couple of months ago, I started doing a regular feature on my website called the ‘Fertility Proust Questionnaire’ (inspired by the Vanity Fair questionnaire of the same name but with a fertility twist). Each month I interview a different woman who is trying to conceive. For July, it’s the author of the beautiful blog Today I Hope. I asked her the question ‘What do you think about fur babies?’ and she said she’d recently got a kitten and the experience of her coming up for a cuddle is such a blessing. (It’s a really great interview – to read it in full click here).

It reminded me of a conversation I recently had with a friend who is childless by choice but has two rescue cats and a dog. She told me that just stroking her cats has the capacity to turn a bad day at work around. And she said that what’s wonderful about dogs is, unlike babies (or indeed partners!), their love is unconditional. That’s it. Show me the way to the RSPCA.

To fur, or not to fur: that is my question…



  1. barrenbetty

    I joined borrowmydoggy.com a while ago… You could try that? You get the fun of walking dogs and looking after them for long weekends etc without any of the responsibility! Great for me since my entire family is allergic to fur. No fur babies are allowed in our house!

    I also loved Today I Hope’s questionnaire. Made me love her a little bit more.

    • thepursuitofmotherhood

      Oooh will definitely take a look at borrowmydoggy but what if I don’t want to give it back! Jessica x

  2. ladyloveandbabydust

    I agree that my cats too have changed how I deal with ttc. It’s so nice to have that unconditional love and affection even when you didn’t know you needed it. When I went through my last miscarriage both my furrbabies were next to me loving in me the whole few days.

    • thepursuitofmotherhood

      Thanks so much for commenting (and thanks for liking my posts regularly, I really appreciate it). I’ve had such a lovely response to this blog, I’m starting to feel that I must find a way to bring a cat into my life soon. It’s been so sad reading your blog posts over the last few weeks. I understand all too well that feeling of hope then disappointment. I hope you’re doing ok. Jessica x

      • ladyloveandbabydust

        Your very welcome! Also, thank you for your kind words, they are much appreciated.

  3. Joanne harper

    Jessica – defiantly get a fur baby – In case you didn’t know I am a BIG fan of Fur babies. Following my first miscarriage my girlie fur baby did not leave my side for days, I cant describe the comfort I felt just stroking her & listening to her purr. After our last lot of IVF failed, my Husband bought me a Bengal X boy fur baby. He may be the most spoilt fur baby on the planet, but his love is unconditional!
    Good luck in whatever fur baby you decide upon – I promise you, you will not regret it!

    • thepursuitofmotherhood

      After all the comments I’ve had on here, twitter, email etc. I’m totally sold. Just wish I’d got one years ok. Thanks so much for your comment, hope life is looking up. Jessica x